He’s Just Not That Into You

Girls are taught a lot of stuff growing up.

If a guy punches you he likes you.

Never try to trim your own bangs and someday you will meet a wonderful guy and get your very own happy ending.

Every movie we see, Every story we’re told implores us to wait for it, the third act twist, the unexpected declaration of love, the exception to the rule.

But sometimes we’re so focused on finding our happy ending we don’t learn how to read the signs. How to tell from the ones who want us and the ones who don’t, the ones who will stay and the ones who will leave.

And maybe a happy ending doesn’t include a guy, maybe… it’s you, on your own, picking up the pieces and starting over, freeing yourself up for something better in the future.

Maybe the happy ending is… just… moving on.

Or maybe the happy ending is this, knowing after all the unreturned phone calls, broken-hearts, through the blunders and misread signals, through all the pain and embarrassment you never gave up hope.

[#3: 10+ Ways To Get A Guy Ask You Out]

So you like him. Call it a crush, butterflies in the stomach or love at first sight, bottom line – you like him. Now the question is how do you get HIM to like YOU enough to ask you out? There is no sure-fire formula. But do not despair!

Here are 10 easy suggestions for you to experiment with and Cupid will do the rest!

1. Be yourself …

Few things put a man off as much as artifice. So if you are talking louder or laughing or smiling more than you normally do, ease up. It may actually backfire. (this is the one of 5 Common First Date Mistakes)

2. Extend this point to external appearances too …

If you are uncomfortable with very short skirts, high heels and dramatic make-up stay clear of them. A natural look and one that you are comfortable with, is very attractive.

3. Accentuate your advantages …

Instead of killing your confidence by following uncomfortable fashion trends, look exquisite by just accentuating your physical advantages. Whether the most beautiful thing about you is your height, your complexion, your eyes or anything else, draw attention to it with flattering clothes and make-up.

4. Take the initiative …

Shrinking coy violets rarely get noticed. So don’t wait the entire evening praying fervently that he will talk to you. Do it first. Smile or say hello to him. Your confidence will disarm him.

5. Leave small gates and windows open …

After you have surmounted that initial wall, leave small gates and windows open. Respond to him physically and verbally with frequent glances and smiles, commenting on the topics and statements he makes and laughing at his jokes. He will realize that you are interested in him.

[#2: How to Get a Guy to Like You]

Do you want a guy to be crazy about you, the way you are about him? While you can’t make someone feel a certain way, you can definitely put your best foot forward and give his feelings a chance to develop. Here are some helpful hints on how to charm a guy, while still being yourself.

Steps

1. Like yourself. Whether you’re goofy, silly, crazy, quirky, smart, reserved, or whatever, how can you expect a guy to like you if you don’t like yourself? You’ve got to show this person how awesome you are, but first you need to know how awesome you are. Build up your self confidence. Now, this doesn’t mean you have to be loud, boisterous, arrogant, chatty, or forward. It just means getting to a place where you’re comfortable in your own skin. You can be secure, sweet and humble all at the same time. Guys like confident, interesting girls who have their own lives. The only guys who like insecure girls are the ones who are insecure themselves. But who wants to be with a guy who wants a girl to feel bad about herself? That’s not healthy, and you deserve better.
2. Crack a joke. Having a good sense of humor makes everything better. That doesn’t mean you should be a giggling fool, laughing at everything that crosses your path. Express your sense of humor in your own way. Some people are witty and sarcastic, others can tell hilarious stories, and many people just do quirky things and poke fun at themselves. No matter what tickles your sense of humor, it’s much easier to like someone who you can have a good laugh with once in a while. If you don’t find something to laugh about together, then maybe you’ll discover that you don’t like him after all!
3. Have patience. These things take time. You can’t force someone to like you, and trying to hurry things up can ruin the courtship altogether. Give him some space and don’t be obsessive. Let things progress at a natural pace, or fade out of natural causes. Eventually he’ll tell you one way or another whether or not he’s interested in reciprocating your affection. And if he’s not, don’t hang around him like a lost puppy. Sometimes you might be incompatible in ways that you don’t see, and sometimes a guy just isn’t ready for a long term relationship. Don’t take rejection too personally. It happens. Not everyone in the world is going to like you. Move on! There are other fish in the sea and if you followed the first step, you know that you’re a good catch.

1. Get his attention. He can’t fancy you if he doesn’t know you exist. If you haven’t caught his eye yet, then get him to notice you. You’ve got to walk before you run, right? Say “Hi”. Say “Good-bye”. Wave. When he reciprocates, is when you know he notices you. Introduce yourself somehow and make conversation. Take an interest in who he is–what he likes, where he’s coming from, where he wants to go–and show him who you are, too. While some guys don’t like to talk that much, it’s nearly impossible for someone to like you if he doesn’t get to know you–unless he “likes” you for all the wrong reasons.

1. Do things together. If he loves rock-climbing, ask him if he can show you how, and make a good-faith effort to see why he’s so into it. Have an open mind. Find out what you have in common, and include him in your world. If you love a certain kind of music, ask him if he’s ever listened to a particular artist and offer to play a CD for him. Finding activities that you can enjoy together can really lay down a bond and further his appreciation of you.

Do’s

1. Be an all-around great person. If you focus on being a clean, motivated, kind, and humorous individual, how can anyone resist? Some guys might be intimidated, and they’re too insecure to be worth your interest anyway. But it’s only a matter of time before a guy who can like you for who you really are will come around and see that you’re an awesome person to be around.
2. Some people prefer being friends first, others prefer to avoid the “just a friend” zone. Ideally, you can be a little bit of both–a friend and a romantic interest.
3. Keep in mind that you cannot control what other people think and do. He may be the object of your interest, but that does not create any obligation that you be his. Turn the situation around. If there was some random guy who took an interest in you, is there anything that he could do to make you like him? Probably not. You will like him or not. You will find him attractive or not. You will find him funny or not. All he can do is try to be the best person he can be, and hope that you agree. The reverse is also true. Be the best person you can be, and let it develop–or not–from there.
4. Don’t talk about your other prospective guys with the guy you’re interested in. It’s just not good form, and it’s a good way to get rid of him.
5. If there is no sign of him being interested in you, that doesn’t necessarily mean that he isn’t interested. He could just be shy, or be a little frightened, especially if he hasn’t dated anyone for a long time.
6. And don’t forget to smile! It’s an age old, safe way to extend and invitation to a guy to socialize. Plus it’s totally free and increases your face’s real estate value instantly!

Don’t’s

1. Don’t play stupid mind games or send mixed signals. This confuses the guy and has tons of potential for embarrassment.
2. If your friends aren’t the most mature, do not tell them about him. They will immediately start staring at him and start giggling and chatting and so on. No matter what you say to them, they will look at him. The worst case scenario is when your friends go off on their own and start pestering the guy with a whole lot of questions that all sound a lot like ‘What do you think of Jessica?’. This will send him packing.
3. Trying too hard to “get” a specific person to like you can be manipulative, something that no one finds attractive or wants to be the object of.
4. If these steps work a little too well and he comes on too strong, let him know to take it easy and don’t do anything you feel uncomfortable with.
5. Don’t confuse kindness with him liking you. Sometimes it’s hard to tell the difference, but be attentive and you’ll figure it out.
6. If he is dating someone else, he is completely off limits. Respect him by not tempting him to get involved with someone else.
7. DO NOT GET PREGNANT! sometimes when a guy likes you, his hormones run crazy, and he’ll try to put you in that position. if he does, GET OUT!

[#1: How To Get A Guy To Notice You]

If you want to know how to make a guy fall in love with you, then this is not the article for you. This is for those who have noticed a guy and want him to notice her back (getting him to like you is a whole other story). Luckily, getting a guy to notice you is easier because it involves the use of basic social skills. You should be honest, direct, pleasant, and reasonable.

1. Be sure that his attention is what you want. Don’t just try to get a guy to look your way, you want attention and you want to feel good about yourself. You don’t want to lead someone on like a puppy taken out for a walk. You could end up in a very awkward or uncomfortable situation–see the Warnings below.
2. Be yourself. Everyone probably says this, but it’s true! No guy wants a girl to pretend she is something she’s not. As a general rule, guys don’t expect girls to change. Resist the temptation to put on a show or to do anything that just isn’t you just to get his attention.
3. Get a new look. Don’t change who you are (you never want to do that because you’ll actually end up changing yourself) just try something different; if he doesn’t like you for who you are let him be. Try a new hairstyle, new clothes, etc. It’s a good idea to change things up once in a while, just because variety’s the spice of life, and it might help you catch his eye. Try being that girl who is different from all the other okay looking girls giving him the eyes, because beauty is common, but a good outlook and a great energy are very rare.
4. Smile and make eye contact. Whether closed-mouth or open-mouth, do it. Unless it really makes you feel artificial, learn how to shoot people a reassuring smile, letting them know that you’re a happy and confident person who wants to enjoy life. The idea is to communicate that you’re inviting their company.
5. Flirt. Do it as little or as much as you want, but remember that too much flirting (especially with other guys) will likely get him to take notice, but perhaps not in a good way. If he reacts and you don’t think its real (he’s just doing it because you’re there and you’re a girl and he thinks he can do better, let him know he can’t). If he is faking it, call his bluff and say something that makes him know you don’t think he is ‘all that’. For example, if he comes close, pull a face and offer him gum. This will unbalance his ego.
6. Start up conversations that have to do with if it’s where you are or if he’s talking to you. Make sure you don’t go on about nothing. Definitely make sense when you talk to him. Don’t twirl your hair, flick your eyelashes or GIGGLE nonstop. He can get kind of scared and make fun of you, no matter how old you are, guys will always be the same. Be yourself! Just be who you are, thats the # 1 quality guys look for in a girl.
7. Hang out with him often; you don’t always want to be hanging around because you might look like an annoying bug that’s always around and never goes away. Try to start a conversation about an interesting topic, for example if your at a football game ask confidently, but cutely “did i miss any action?”. This will tell him that you want to know about the game, but also you want to get his opinion so he will automatically talk to you about the game (or other topics) the whole game. Start slowly like a movie or party try not to make it so noticeable cause he might not be interested.
8. Talk to him. Try to get to know him a little by discussing things you have in common. A good way to start a conversation is to ask him a question. Listen to him and don’t interrupt him when he is talking. You could even compliment him or ask for help. A good opener is spray two different perfumes on each wrist, then go up to him and ask him his favorite. This should get him to talk to you. Also be friendly to his friends to help him feel more comfortable around you. Some guys don’t notice girls unless they talk to the guy.
9. Be assertive. You are the girl. You have the power. A lot of guys are shy and awkward around girls they like, so don’t hold back. Do what you want to do. Boys like a powerful girl. Be decisive. Tell him what you want him to do, etc.–just don’t get too bossy!
10. Make him feel special. There’s got to be a reason that you want him to notice you, and that’s because you noticed him first. Let him know–subtly–that you’re interested in who he is, and that you sincerely want to get to know him better.
11. Be brave. Stand up for who you are, and what you believe in. Ultimately, this will catch the attention and respect of someone who is going to work well for you, even if it turns out not to be this guy.
12. Don’t be a slob! It’s a real turn-off for a guy when he notices a girl hasn’t brushed her hair or wears the same outfit every other day. Even if you don’t fall within the typical expectations, just looking presentable is always desirable–irrespective of who is the guy or girl.
13. Just Talk To Him. When it comes down to it, talking to a guy, and flirting with him will get his attention, and if it doesn’t then nothing will.
14. Walk in front of him. It may be very simple, but it works. When coming out of the class, or playing in gym class, just walk in front of him, and he should be able to notice you. If he walks in front of you a lot, he probably likes you.

Nobody wanna see us together
But it don’t matter no
‘Cause I got you babe babe
Nobody wanna see us together
But it don’t matter no
‘Cause I got you babe
‘Cause we gonna fight
Oh yes we gonna fight
Believe we gonna fight
We gonna fight
Fight for our right to love yeah
Nobody wanna see us together
But it don’t matter no
‘Cause I got you

Nobody wanna see us together
Nobody thought we’d last forever
I feel ‘em hopin’ and prayin’
Things between us don’t get better
Men steady comin’ after you
Women steady comin’ after me
Seem like everybody wanna go for self
And don’t wanna respect boundaries
Tellin’ you all those lies
Just to get on your side
But I must admit there was a couple secrets
I held inside
But just know that I tried
To always apologize
And I’ma have you first always in my heart
To keep you satisfied

[Chorus]

Got every right to wanna leave
Got every right to wanna go
Got every right to hit the road
And never talk to me no more
You don’t even have to call
Even check for me at all
Because the way I been actin’ lately
Has been off the wall
Especially towards you
Puttin’ girls before you
And they watchin’ everything I been doin’
Just to hurt you
Most of it just ain’t true
Ain’t true
And they won’t show you
How much of a queen you are to me
And why I love you baby

[Chorus]

Oh oh oh oh oh
‘Cause I got you
‘Cause I got you
Oh
‘Cause I got you babe
‘Cause I got you

Nobody wanna see us together
But it don’t matter no
‘Cause I got you babe
Nobody wanna see us together
But it don’t matter no
‘Cause I got you babe
‘Cause we gonna fight
Oh yes we gonna fight
Believe we gonna fight
We gonna fight
Fight for our right to love yeah
Nobody wanna see us together
But it don’t matter no
‘Cause I got you
Nobody wanna see us together
But it don’t matter no
‘Cause I got you babe
Nobody wanna see us together
But it don’t matter no
‘Cause I got you babe
‘Cause we gonna fight
Oh yes we gonna fight
Believe we gonna fight
We gonna fight
Fight for our right to love yeah
Nobody wanna see us together
But it don’t matter no
‘Cause I got you

Look at me, I’m as helpless as a kitten up a tree,
And I feel like I’m clinging to a cloud, I can’t understand,
I get misty, just holding your hand.

Walk my way, and a thousand violins begin to play,
Or it might be the sound of your hello, that music I hear,
I get misty, the moment you’re near.

You can say that you’re leading me on,
But it’s just what I want you to do,
Don’t you notice how hopelessly I’m lost,
That’s why I’m following you.

On my own, I would wander through this wonderland alone,
Never knowing my right foot from my left, my hat from my glove,
I’m too misty, and too much in love.
I’m too misty, and too much in love

Password account wordpress gue ternyata masih pake nama dia… *sigh* Password account friendster juga!!! *(–’)*
Jadi teringat peristiwa dan kenangan di masa lalu… Uugh!!! WTF!!!
…..
……..
………..
Huaaaaaaaaaaa… (@_@’)
Cediyh, hiks. Yasudahlah, emang Astri chayank mau apa? Kenyataannya seperti itu… Udah ya, jangan dipikirin lagi. Tuh, inget kata Bang Cosmos yang hampir jadi Sp. M:
“sekedar habiskan sisa hidup dengan berkarya dan berpikir positip..”
Sekedar? Tapi hidup bukanlah sekedar “sekedsar” kan…
Yah begitulah.
Tetep aja gue sedih.

(#_#’)

Forensik day #3. Katanya hari ini akan nada praktikum pemeriksaan luar. Mengawali hari di forensik dengan belanja di Bursa Kedokteran, ngeborong jas lab, sarung tangan karet washable, sarung tangan lateks disposable, adjustable face mask, dan Reader’s Digest edisi Mei 2009. Yang terakhir enggak denk, uangnya kurang. Belanjaan itu aja udah ngabisin tujuh puluh delapan ribu rupiah tanpa termasuk Reader’s Digest-nya.

Oke. Setelah belanja-belanja, tinggal nunggu mayat buat praktikum pemeriksaan luar. Ada dua, masih dalam keadaan sangat bagus, salah satunya malah dalam keadaan beku setengah mencair, so masih seger.. Tentang bau? Hm. Lebih bau kamar autopsi daripada mayatnya sendiri ;p

Lalu? Ya gitu deh. Belum baca, masih bloon dan level tandem estrogen-progesteron gue lagi menukik tajam. Menukik? Melorot? Haha. Yang pasti mata ini beberapa kali melotot (emang bisa? Jadi pengen tau ;p). thanks to the face mask, menutupi separuh wajah jadi nggak terlalu vulgar ekspresinya.

Padahal di hari pertama gue masih ngerasa like I’m the happiest girl  in the world! Trus mengemukakan hipotesis tentang level estrogen dan progesteron yg lagi tinggi. That’s life, sometimes we find irony.

Siang ke kansit, makan siang, doing chit-chat, hujan deras, jadi males balik ke forensik. For your information, sebenernya ada lagi satu mayat korban gantung diri dan satu lagi mayat segar kecelakaan lalu lintas yang masih sangat segar… Fresh from the TKP aka tempat kejadian perkara. Me? Of course, I passed it (^_^)v –happily passed it–

Apa yang terjadi di hari pertama forensik? Hm. Yang pertama, gue jatuh cinta pada pandangan pertama sama forensik. Are you sure about that? Hm.. Nggak masalah kan, namanya juga jatuh cinta. Boleh-boleh aja dan sah-sah aja, masalah dilanjutkan jadi mencintai atau tidak, ya urusan nanti ;p

Terus, issue apa yang happening di hari pertama forensic? Drum roll please… Pembagian kelompok. Ketua kami aka RA memberikan pilihan kepada anggotanya untuk menentukan metode pemilihan kelompok. (Gosh, anyone but u know who ;p)

Ya. Dan aura dilemma mulai menyebar ke seluruh penjuru ruang kuliah forensic yang dingiin -hiperbolik- ;D Siapa dengan siapa? Who with who? Hm. Mulai deh keliatan muke-muke yang macem-macem. Kalo lagi begini nih paham kesukuan ups, ke-geng-an mulai ketara banget. Ya begitulah. You know what. ;p

Trus bagaimana dengan prakiraan mood gue hari ini? Mood forecast: today I’m in a good mood. I feel good. Why? Nggak tau tuh, merasa bahagia dan siap menghadapi apapun. Single and ready to mingle. Tanya kenapa? Teori pertama: minggu ini adalah minggu dimana hormon-hormon gue tercinta sedang ada dalam level yang oke untuk mempertahankan mood gue dalam keadaan “baik” (^_^) Happy…

Teori kedua: mungkin ini masih bagian dari euphoria pasca melewati IKK yang (katanya sich) stressful. Hehehe. Tapi kalo teori ini bener, kenapa ya sejak 2 minggu yang lalu, yaitu minggu ujian dan minggu sebelum ujian gue udah mulai tampak “normal” dan “bahagia”? Tugas-tugas gue baru selesai di minggu ujian, jadi pastinya bukan karena tugas terselesaikan lebih awal.

Love life? Nope. Nobody’s in charge. But still, I’m happy… (n_n) Feels like I’m the happiest girl in the world (sumpah, lebay abis deh.. Hohoho)

Psst… Pembagian kelompok nih, drum roll (again) please : …Kelompok 4: ruth, simon, sur, astri

Jaga pertama: Jumat, 22 Mei 2009.

Jaga besar: 08.30 – 12.00

Minggu I   à Sabtu

Minggu II  à Minggu

Minggu III à Sabtu

Minggu IV à Sabtu

Hm. Jaga besar pas weekend. Masih bisa terima job gak ya?

“Lord is my shepherd, I shall not be in want.” – Psalm 23 : 1

Head under water,
And they tell me to breathe easy for a while
Breathing gets harder, even I know that

Made room for me but it’s too soon to see,
If I’m happy in your hands
I’m unusually hard to hold on to

Blank stares at blank pages
No easy way to say this
You mean well, but you make this hard on me

I’m not gonna write you a love song,
‘Cause you asked for it,
‘Cause you need one, you see
I’m not gonna write you a love song,
‘Cause you tell me it’s,
Make or breaking this
If you’re on your way,
I’m not gonna write you to stay, heeey
All you have is leaving,
I’m gonna need a better reason to write you
A love song today
Today, (yeah) today, yeehhh

I learned the hard way,
That they all say things you wanna hear
My heavy heart sinks deep down under you,
And your twisted words, your help just hurts
You are not what I thought you were
Hello to high and dry

Convinced me to please you
Made me think that I need this too
I’m trying to let you hear me as I am

I’m not gonna write you a love song,
‘Cause you asked for it,
‘Cause you need one, you see
I’m not gonna write you a love song,
‘Cause you tell me it’s,
Make or breaking this
If you’re on your way,
I’m not gonna write you to stay, heeyy
If all you have is leaving,
I’m gonna need a better reason to write you
A love song today

ohh,ohh
Promise me (ohh,ohh,oh,oh) you’ll leave the light on (ohh,ohh,oh,oh),
To help me see (ohh,ohh,oh,oh),
daylight my guide (ohh,ohh,oh,oh) gone (ohh,ohh,oh,oh)
‘Cause I believe (ohh,ohh,oh,oh) there’s a way
you can love me because I say, ohhh

I won’t write you a love song,
‘Cause you asked for it,
‘Cause you need one you see
I’m not gonna write you a love song,
‘Cause you tell me it’s make or breaking this
Is that why you wanted a love song,
‘Cause you asked for it,
‘Cause you need one you see
I’m not gonna write you a love song,
‘Cause you tell me it’s make or breaking this
If you’re on your way,
I’m not gonna write you to stay, heeyyy
If your heart is nowhere in it,
I don’t want it for a minute
Babe, I’ll walk the seven seas when
I believe that there’s a reason to,
Write you a love song today
Todaaaay, ehhhhh
Yeah, yeah